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missmaim @ 2009-06-27T01:33:00

2009-06-27T05:35:08Z

I certainly appreciate that even though I have a terrible track record with men, and can't seem to pick a good one, I have definately picked myself a great group of friends. And I wouldn't trade that for the greatest man on earth.

Writer's Block: When I Was Young

2009-06-24T23:47:32Z

What do you miss most about being a kid?

Submitted By daeinleyof

View 502 Answers

Not being damaged and brokenhearted.

Make it up as we go along..

2009-06-21T22:59:58Z

Maybe the fact that it is going well is depressing me because I feel like at any moment it's going to turn to crap, or something is going to happen to him, and I'm so afraid to have my heart shattered again, because I don't know how much is left of it. I'm looking for something to be wrong and waiting for him to tell me he doesn't want to see me anymore. And thinking that is probably what is going to make it happen.

I'm trying so hard to stay positive and enjoy the fact that I'm in something healthy and mature. The only real problem right now is that his roommate probably hates me, although I haven't figured out why yet. It's a little concerning.

And all I can think now is that this is so stupid and petty, because people have real problems. I just want so badly to enjoy this time with him that I have, because anything can happen. And hopefully I can get past all of the damage of my previous relationships and do that.

And my thoughts are with someone right now who's sadness is very real. And I hope that we can all just appreciate having those we love around us for as long as we have them around.

"And the sun on your face,
I'm freezing that frame.
And somewhere off he cries
and says enjoy his every smile
....

How did it go so fast?
you'll say as we are looking back.
And then we'll understand,
We held gold dust in our hands."

Tori Amos - Gold Dust

It's a Christmas miracle!

2008-12-16T00:30:33Z

I took Marmalade for her first vet visit today...and yes..it's a HER! The vet assistant was so surprised that she wanted the vet to make sure..and even the vet was surprised because an orange cat like that is so very rarely female.

It blows my mind that I always wanted an orange female cat, but knew I'd likely never find one..and this gorgeous and sweet little creature happened into my life. I feel so blessed :)

She's very healthy and did extremely well at the vet. They estimate her to be about 5 years old, so we picked January 21st (my birthday) 2003 as her birthday. She got her shots for the year and they think she's likely spayed, but couldn't tell for sure without shaving her. We decided to wait and see if she exhibits any signs of going into heat.

That was the best $99.97 I have ever spent. It is such a relief to know she is healthy and now has her shots and is also not very old, so there's a good chance I will have her for a long time :)

If I didn't already believe in fate, I sure as f*$% do now!

By the way, if you are looking for a good vet in the city I highly recommend the Dundas Euclid Animal Hospital. They were fantastic.

room available May 1st

2008-12-15T02:51:25Z

One of my roommates is moving out, the one that has my old room. She's moving back to Japan after school is done. I figured I'd spread the word.

It's available MARCH 1st and it's $480/month inclusive except for internet, which you can share for about $20/month.

About the house:
Shared kitchen
NO livingroom...although the basement used to be one before it became mostly storage and then subsequently got dirty and dusty. If you had a magic touch you could turn it back into a living room..I've never had the energy for it.
Free washer/dryer in basement
Quiet street near Queen/Bathurst
everyone has their own bathroom, but be warned, if someone else is taking a shower, you probably won't get enough water for a shower of your own until they're done.

About the room:
fits a double bed and a large desk (I also had my bicycle in it so it's a decent size)
your own bathroom in the basement (except for sharing the washer and dryer)
bedroom is on the main floor
large window
regular sized closet

About your roommates:
Me...for now, although by May I'll likely have moved out or be in the process of it. And i keep a cat in my room.
There is also a girl living in the front room. She's pretty cool and we'd probably be friends if we ever saw each other.
Generally it's like living on your own, except that you can hear your roommates coming and going and run into each other in the kitchen sometimes.

I think that's it. Let me know if you want to arrange with her to view it.

It's not like I'm a rock.

2008-12-14T19:53:43Z

Sometimes someone says somethng, or you see something or someone, and it brings back a painfull reminder of something that hurt you really badly. It sits in your stomach and the back of your throat for a moment and wrestles you to the ground. It spits as it whispers in your ear "you are not invulnerable".

As the self-doubt creeps over you, something inside of you suddenly wells up and starts over-powering it. No, you're not invulnerable, but you sure have picked yourself up, haven't you? You certainly haven't let the pain of the past ruin your life. And while you're not as over it as you'd like, you're doing pretty fucking well, and everyone can see it.

In some ways, you're even better than you were before. So in some small, sick way, you're glad for what has hurt you. You're even glad for the odd painfull reminder, because it also reminds you of what you have become since then. And you're proud of what you have become.

So fucking bring it on. I am not impenetrable, but I won't go down without throwing a few punches.

I has kitteh

2008-12-07T18:12:30Z

I went into work about a week ago and the receptionist said "Are you sure you don't want a baby?". It was early in the morning and I wasn't quite sure of what to make of that question, but I was pretty sure the answer was "yes, I'm sure". She then went on to tell me about an abandoned cat in her apartment building. The woman above her had moved out, and three days later, when the landlord went to check out the damage, he found a cat. A beautiful orange cat. I have always wanted an orange cat. As much as it pained me, I said no at first, because I didn't think I could keep a cat here. But as the week wore on and a home was not found for the cat, I decided to run it by my housemates. They both said it was fine with them, and I fully expect to be moving in a couple of months anyway, so yesterday I brought her home.

I'm referring to her as a "her" for now, but I really haven't been able to get close enough to know for sure, and I don't want to go prodding at her and freaking her out so early on. I'll let the vet do that. Because of her colouration I want to say it's a boy, because so few orange cats are female (about 1/3). It's especially rare when they're orange all over like this, but the landlord who was feeding her was convinced it was a girl so I'm going with that for now.

Having been neglected, abandonded and possibly abused, I fully expected it to take a long time for her to warm up to me but once we were out of that horrible apartment, she was rubbing her head on my fingers which were sticking in the cat carrier and purring. When I got her home she came right out of the carrier and started wandering around my room sniffing everything and purring. After 5 minutes she was already eating and drinking and rubbing up against me. Last night she even slept by my feet on the bed. I woke up and there she was. I was amazed. She even let me brush out all of the matted fur clumps from her back. I had figured I'd have to get the vet to do that, but she didn't fuss at all and now she's all soft and shiny. It took nearly an hour to get them all out and my wastebasket looks like there's a kitten in it.

It's pretty miraculous how well she has adjusted in such a short time and how affectionate she is. It was a little touch and go today as she swatted at me a couple of times when I was patting her and tried to nip at me, but I expect she's going to test me and assert herself. And for all I know she has sore spots. She may have also been just playing or maybe it's a behavioural problem I'll have to deal with later, but I don't know enough about her yet to know for sure. I'm giving her lots of space to do her own thing. I don't really want to risk getting bitten in case there is an underlying medical condition. I'll feel much better after she's been checked over by the vet this week.

I really couldn't have picked a better cat if I had a choice. She's beautiful, sweet and pretty affectionate considering what she's been through. I imagine in time she'll become even more affectionate, which I'm hoping for. Our hair even nearly matches, although she's a tiny bit darker than I am. The way this cat came to be in my home just all seems meant to be. I'll be even more blown away if it turns out to be a female because of the rarity of orange females and the fact that I always wanted an orange female if I found one. Not that i'd ever go out of my way to get one. I'd only feel right getting a cat from a shelter or in a situation like this one.

For now I'm calling her Marmalade. If it turns out to be a boy I'll have to re-think that.

Here's a picture of my adorable new roommate

Oh Hawksley..you strange, beautiful man.

2008-11-29T23:22:23Z

I went to see Hawksley Workman last night at Massey Hall. I had never seen him live before so I wasn't sure what to expect, but I did not expect it to be that amazing.

The show was opened by Hey Rosetta! who are a phenomenal band. I had seen the lead singer, Tim Baker, perform solo as an opener for Sarah Slean once and ended up getting his band's cd, which he graciously signed for me. It was great to see him with the entire band.

Hawksley and his band really blew me away. He had a musician, Jesse Zubot on stage from Vancouver who did strange and amazing things with a violin. I have never heard anyone make sounds like that with a violin before. A keyboardist, bassist, and drummer rounded out the group and all were very talented. Hawksley's dad came up on stage to play the drums for one song, which was just really cute to see.

During the song Striptease something happened to the speakers. We were no longer able to really hear much but when Hawksley realized the problem he improvized. He borrowed an acoustic guitar off of Hey Rosetta! frontman Tim Baker and with violinist Jesse by his side, went up to the front of the stage and performed a haunting acoustic version of Anger As Beauty. The keyboardist quietly played in background as the entire venue went so silent I could have sworn that everyone stopped breathing. It was certainly a breath-taking performance. About two thirds through the song the speakers came back on and the keyboard became louder. Hawksley and Jesse slowly made their way back behind the microphones and Hawksley swapped the acoustic for an electric. Suddenly the entire band started rocking out the song the way it was meant to be played. It was seamless, almost as though it had been planned that way. I was actually glad for the malfunction, just because it was such an amazing thing to see.

Hawksley and his band recieved a standing ovation that continued after they had left the stage. They came back out for the encore and brought with them the entire Hey Rosetta! crew. There were 11 musicians on stage all together and they all performed Your Beauty Must Be Rubbing Off. It was a spectacularly perfect end to an amazing concert.

I really had no idea what I was in for and I will definately see Hawksley perform live again.

So very amused.

2008-09-15T23:19:07Z

Today's 'Word of the Day' was 'evanescent'. Suddenly I was reminded of a band I used to hear a lot about, "Evanescence". The definition of evanescent is: "Liable to vanish or pass away like vapor; fleeting."

So...what have they been up to lately? I'm thinking it was perhaps not the best choice of band names.

bumble bee style

2008-09-06T22:48:46Z

I happened upon a couple of bumble bees mating today. It was the wierdest thing I have ever seen. Unfortunately I'm dumb and didn't take my camera out with me. I tried to find a picture, but the best I could find is the picture below. it doesn't really do it justice. The ones I saw there was one was on it's back and the other was overtop of it on all 4's...6's? ...anyway...it was kinda sexy..I mean if it were people.

That's all.

http://k53.pbase.com/v3/56/596756/2/50994974.MatingBumbleBees.jpg

takin' a lesson.

2008-08-23T03:51:25Z

Went to the nuclear for a couple of britney's and a bowler with one of my china's tonight. There weren't as many jam rolls there as usual, which is good because they give me the bacons....those pillocks.

Oh this slang gives me the bubbles.

Sigh

2008-08-20T21:55:53Z

I clearly have a lot to learn. I didn't realize that I can't really publicly criticize someone's work without legal repricussion. I'm really confused by this, but I'd rather be safe than sorry.

how to explain...

2008-08-19T22:29:01Z

This was created using stickers from the 1950's. It's sort of like an animated children's book. Drugs may have been involved...
It is definately one of the most interesting things I have seen in a long time.

scholarly advice

2008-08-11T23:28:49Z

I'm still weighing my education options. I have always regretted not getting a degree, but I wonder if it would make any difference to get one now. It's not that I think it's too late, I just don't know if it will really matter if I have one by the time I'm able to finish one (probably by the time I'm 35 if I started next year). I mean, in 6 years I may be able to advance my career through experience to the same level as if I had a degree now. Heck, in 6 years I may be re-married and starting a family and when would I have time for school then?

I have a lot of options in terms of taking part time courses at local colleges, but I think what it boils down to is the prestige and the piece of paper, and whether or not it's worth it. I have discovered that the University of Windsor offers a few degrees through distance education, which could be a good option. I wouldn't even hesitate, but it does cost about $20,000 for a 3 year Bachelor's Degree (which I would have 5 years to complete)...and heck, that could be a downpayment on a house. I also wouldn't be utilizing a loan. I would be saving up for the first year and then puting money aside as I go, since I would also be working full time.

That being said, I would absolutely love it if those of you with a degree (Bachelor's and/or Master's) would mind answering a few questions for me, to help me decide if this is something I should pursue. You don't have to answer all of the questions if you don't feel comfortable answering them. I will screen the comments so that only I can read them.

Questions are under the cut.

For those of you without a degree, I have 3 questions:

1. Do you regret not having a degree?
2. If you had the means to get one now would you? and what subject?

Thanks in advance!

1. What is the highest level of education you completed? (B,M,PHD)
2. What did you get your degree in?
3. Have you ever regretted having a degree?
4. Do you think you would regret NOT having a degree?
5. If you could go back and change what your degree was,
would you? and if so, what would you take instead?
6. Are you working in a field directly related to your degree?
7. Do you think that your degree has helped you in your career?
8. If you were me and had the means to either get a degree or
save up for a downpayment, which would you choose?

CANNOT CONTAIN EXCITEMENT!!

2008-07-30T23:21:18Z

I have just discovered that there is a musical t.v. series called Dr.Horrible's Sing-Along Blog.

It stars Neil Patrick Harris and Nathan Fillion!

I have no idea how to find this and I am still in a tizzy just thinking about it. When I have stopped wetting myself maybe I'll have more details...

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1227926/
http://doctorhorrible.net/

relief

2008-07-19T01:38:57Z

My roommate found someone to take over his room. My new roommate will be his sister. I'm actually fairly glad that it's a girl. I hope she has better habbits than he does. There is a great sense of releif that it's not going to be a complete stranger.

It's the small things that make me most proud.

2008-07-15T22:05:24Z

One of my photos from Montreal is being considered in the 2008 Schmap Guide to Montreal. It's an online publication, but still pretty cool that one of my obscure little photos is being considered. It seems that I have Flickr to thank for this.

It would be cool if my photo were chosen, but I must say It's an honour just to be noticed in such a small way.

Here's the photo they're considering:

Bonsecours Market

I haven't been this proud of myself since I became a featured writer on Helium. It's amazing how little it takes to impress me.

turnover

2008-07-07T00:45:26Z

My male roommate is moving out. He has lived in this house for a few years, but he's getting a place with his girlfriend. He gave me first dibs on his room, but I can't justify paying the extra $130 in rent right now.

If anyone is interested, the room is HUGE (you can literally do cartwheels in it) and has a bathroom in it. It's $660 per month utilities included. The house has central air and heating (which are controlled by whoever moves into the big room). It's available as soon as August 15th. The biggest perk is probably the adorable redhead who lives here...heh..

I would jump on it if I weren't trying so hard to finnish paying off OSAP by December. It would be nice to have the extra space, but I think it would almost be too much space for me. I don't have enough furniture to fill it. I've kind of settled into my room now anyway and don't feel like moving my stuff around until it's into my own private apartment.

Just let me know if you or someone wants to take a look at it and I'll hook you up with my roomie.

mouse in my house

2008-06-28T20:15:10Z

I kept hearing krinkling plastic last night in my room. I looked all over but couldn't figure out where it was coming from. I thought I was going crazy and was just over-tired. I heard it again this morning and found the culprit. A teeny tiny grey mouse nibbling on a plastic baggie of protein powder. It was so cute, and a relief because I really thought I was going nuts. And it could have been a rat...so a little mouse isn't that bad. I got rid of the baggie and made sure I didn't have any other food-like things in my room. I'm not terribly concerned about it coming back, and I don't think I have it in me to set a mouse trap, unless it was to keep the thing as a pet..which seems a little un-hygenic.

I have to say, this is the first time I've ever lived somewhere where I've seen a mouse inside my home. I guess I'm pretty lucky considering I've lived downtown for 6 years.

it's not intentional...

2008-06-21T16:34:23Z

I get forwards sometimes and most of the time they're hoaxes, like the amazing "marzipan babies" which are actually made of clay..by this artist:
Camille Allen

Now, when I get these "amazing but true!" emails I usually do the research and find out if they really are true (which most of the time they're not). I tend to take the information I find and respond to the person who sent me the forward. I don't do it in a condescending way like "You dumb bastard, how you could possibly think this story was true?!"..I merely say "oh, that would be cool, but I actually found out that it's actually like this.."

I can't help but feel like a jerk, but I like to stop these emails whenever I can to prevent clogging up the internet further with useless information..

I guess what I'm saying is that you may want to do a little research of your own before you send me a forward.

new home search

2008-06-19T04:48:57Z

Oh yeah..I found 4 buildings in my old 'hood that seem to NOT be roach infested (boy do I love doin' research):

79 Jameson (medallion properties)
145 Jameson (medallion properties)
177 Jameson (minto properties)
130 Jameson (myriad properties)

Sadly, there are no vacancies yet, but I'm going to keep in touch with them. 79 is my first choice and is right near the lake.

These buildings were some of the very few passed during the big roach inspections. If any of you know people who have lived in them and had problems or heard bad things about these property management companies, I would greatly appreciate knowing..

once upon a lunch hour

2008-06-05T23:29:06Z

Work was so insane today that I had to get out of the office for a while, so I ate my lunch down by the water. A cute little chickadee flew up onto the bench so I gave it a tiny piece of my bread. I wanted to see how brave it was and I was actually able to get it to jump on my hand to take the bread.

Well...the next thing I knew a duck jumped/flew up and bit off a piece of my sandwich. I can't possibly get mad at a duck for stealing my lunch.

Before I could blink there was a gaggle of feathered creatures surrounding me. I felt like I was cinderella...or in The Birds...

I have to say though, that I actually enjoyed being accosted by birds.

My horoscope today..

2008-06-04T21:40:47Z

Aquarius (Jan. 21 — Feb. 19)

Undue stress is being cultivated by focussing at what appears to be lacking in your life. The cosmos has every intention of improving your situation. By making you wait, it is teaching you to better appreciate what you don't have.

I must note that it is also making me appreciate what I DO have :)

inhale

2008-05-16T01:35:15Z

Tomorrow morning, before work, I head to court to file my divorce papers.
After work I'm getting a massage, courtesy of my work benefits, and then I may just get myself a martini.

In three months or so, when the divorce is final, I just might throw a party.

In other news, as the sunny days progress my hair gets lighter and lighter. I might be blonde soon..with no strawberry to speak of. I'm still not sure if I will dye my hair to rectify this or just accept my fate.

Oh and I think it's a real sign of the times that the most recent America's Next Top Model winner is a "Full figure model". I saw this coming, even though I didn't watch the series. With Madrid deciding to ban models under a certain weight, and other countries looking to follow suit, I thought it was only fitting that this year's winner be girl-shaped. She's a size 8 by the way..which is a far cry from "plus-sized" but still much larger than a typical size 0 model.

Food Blog

2008-05-02T23:24:43Z

Just for fun, I have started a photo food blog. I posted my dinner from tonight.

Sondra's Photo Food Blog

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